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My unfortunate encounter with butterfly lady
Ever since I let the cancer cat out of the bag (the first day) I have had to contend with the standard reaction of 'Yeah, you're da bomb, but really, how are you feeling you poor girl?' Even though I have an amazing life with incredible abundance, some people still only see me as the sick chick. I am constantly told I look AMAZING, but not in a complimentary and flattering sense, more a 'Why aren't you dribbling?' kind of way. I feel fantastic! In fact, last night I hosted an orgy with three steroidsoaked Olympians and a car full of Eastern european strippers, then I ran a marathon, counseled the Dalai Lama, and baked a cake!
You know what I find really scary? There are a lot of people who believe that cancer is caused by some kind of unresolved psychological torment or deep, festering emotional scar. Don get me wrong, I totally 100% agree that the health of my immune system is directly affected by the amount of stress I experience (a little tricky because having cancer, as it turns out, is very stressful) and I do believe that reducing stress can help you heal or even avoid becoming ill in the first place. Eat well, exercise, get enough sleep, and try to avoid stress. By all means, take care of yourself.
Where I get all hot under the collar is at the surprisingly common theory that suppressed trauma is the cause of people cancers. Quite frankly, to shout this out is irresponsible, backward, and a pile of merde. I bring this up because recently I encountered someone who ignorantly told me I was an insecure, caged spirit longing to be free, hence the reason I have cancer. Until that moment I was having a pretty good day, and BAM! I felt guilty for not releasing some gangrenous emotional skeleton in my closet that I should perhaps just see to, for my cancer to go away. More sound advice followed with the recommendation I acquire pictures of butterflies to enable me to imagine myself becoming free of all things negative. Folk like butterfly lady could really benefit from a class called Cancer for a Day. Luckily, I a pretty stable character who happens to brush off negativity quicker than I consume chocolate, but she wasn to know this. In fact, she didn know me at all, and this, dear reader, frustrates me most.
If it really were as simple as sweeping out the old demons, I pretty sure no one would instead opt to suffer the excruciating side effects of drug therapies, chemo and radiation. No one would endure the horror of their hair falling out in clumps, or of having organs or body parts removed whole or in part. Or scary 3monthly scans to see if cancer is still looming in the dark corridor of your life. If it were as easy as a little hardcore therapy, I promise you on behalf of the legions of cancer warriors and especially on behalf of those who didn make it there wouldn be a vacant shrink couch from John O to Lands End.
And furthermore, if there were any real truth to this cockamamie theory, how do you explain the number of very young children who have cancer? Some sandbox dispute they never quite got over? Please. What about the number of people who have suffered horrific psychological traumas and yet remain cancerfree?
Sometimes there just no making sense of it. And what if they could tell me it was something I had done, something I had brought on myself, where would that leave me? Probably with a large quantity of guilt and regrets, and a list of Things To Avoid In Future but I still have cancer right now.
And now that I do have it, I don't particularly want to be told what I should and shouldn be doing to help myself through it. Everyone has a theory on how I should look after myself, what foods I should eat in order to lengthen my life on this planet, which, in most cases, I appreciate, but let just look at the Crocodile Hunter man. There he was, Steve Irwin, cheerfully bounding around swamps and wrestling dangerous reptiles one day then suddenly pierced through the ticker by a seemingly gentle sea creature the next. He didn know what was going to happen to him when he went into the reef that day. He probably had far fewer reservations about swimming with those big portobello mushrooms than he would ever have had about hanging out in crocinfested swamps and you can bet the stats for crocodile deaths are much higher than for deathbystingray. Which is when I realised that statistics are for morons. In reality, you can never know when or how you die, you can only choose how you live. Some people wrestle reptiles, some wrestle cancer. In the end, the obvious danger may not be the thing that strikes you down. After all, that why I still wear a bike helmet!
It seems a lot of people release all manner of bizarre nonsense in a bid to fill the awkward tension of knowing what to say. The people that have never struggled to diffuse the seemingly bad smell of the word Cancer, are my friends, both near or far. Despite having to see someone they love go through this, they always know which perfectly timed noises to make. Take my friend Niall for example, who brushed out all my hair when baldylocks time commenced and called me every derogatory name under the sun, to make me smile again. Or my girl friends who treat me just like they did before the Big C and let me whinge when I need to let off some steam. Talking about cancer in a candid way lets the elephant out of the room. If I could laugh at my situation I wouldn drown in it.
Another person who never ever fails to make me smile is my friend Jamie, who is raising money for CoppaFeel! by driving to Mongolia next week. That, in itself,[url=http://www.floware.fr]sac michael kors[/url], is a pretty cool thing to do for a friend, but from day one, he has stepped up his friendship status and taken magnificent to new heights. Not that I categorise my friends or place them on any kind of Santaesque naughty or nice list, but he well and truly deserves a pay rise. He has dedicated so much of his time to help me fulfil my dream of making the world boob aware, and I don know how to thank him enough. He, like so many, rally around me like a motley army of ferocious angels and it a wee bit humbling. We made it through together. I grateful to them, the people who held my hand and cooked my dinners and shaved my head and made me laugh in spite of it all. It these people that matter, not the ones wearing the purple coloured chakra pants who need to think twice before dumping halfbaked notions on people who need support.
And I want you to check this guy out. Today he brightened my day. If there's anyone making the most of life right now, it'll be him.
Unfortunate indeed to run into 'Butterfly' lady. I have a theory (!) that people who offer ludicrous theories like hers are; 1) Scared to accept the general randomness of things. you never do know when you are going to be thumped round the head by something you didn't see coming. and all of these things and more would be true of you, cancer or not! . x

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the regulations mainly according to our city fire management needs, matters fire and fire regulations shall not complement and refinement of. Fire prevention, fire control, supervision and management of fire protection products, fire safety management, rural fire investigation processing mechanism are regulations highlights, such as improving the apartment for the aged,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], welfare institutions, nursing homes,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], kindergartens and boarding schools and other places of the fire alarm system requirements, the new public buildings over 100 meters in height and standard floor construction area of over 1000 square meters, should set the roof helipad and helicopter rescue facilities etc..
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(Fuzhou Daily reporter Li Bailei)
30 news network in Fuzhou province people's Congress approved the "Regulations" Fuzhou city fire management,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the regulations will come into effect on August 1st this year. Introduced in 1994 and the 2 Revision of the "Fuzhou city fire safety management approach" abolished at the same time. The gas safety public recently attention has also been written regulations,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the provisions of high-rise buildings and public places of entertainment to prohibit the use of bottled liquefied petroleum gas.
regulation in the gas safety,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the use of bottled liquefied petroleum gas,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], no high-rise buildings and public places of entertainment,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], civil air defense engineering and underground construction disable liquefied petroleum gas and gasoline,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], kerosene, flash point less than 60 ℃ liquid as fuel. Any unit and individual shall store settings of liquefied petroleum gas,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], oxygen,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], acetylene and other flammable compressed gas and combustion supporting gas,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], gasoline,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], kerosene and other flammable liquid operating point, in residential or commercial building.
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Shanxi Mount Wutai scenic area of Taiwan Huai temples over the emergence of multicoloured auspicious clouds, so there is a Chinese idiom "auspicious sign" or "Rui Cai auspicious clouds".